So I was checking old photo albums, looking for pictures I could use for my mom’s birthday present.
I ended with some more ideas for drawings and thoughts about parenthood, childhood, memories.
I’ve always imagined that a person is adult, when they stop thinking what mother would say about them. For some time now my attitude towards my parents has changed a lot.
I used to have many claims about their behaviour, for a long time I was hurt, remembering what they did wrong. After years of thoughts and work, forgiveness day has come. They didn’t ask for it, it just happened. Not in words, just in my mind, but I felt really relieved.
I’ve learned to see them not as my guardians, but as people that in my age had 3 children. When I stopped awaitening parenting care from them, I finally felt like an adult person.
When you separate all this expectations of a child, it leaves just two people, who did mistakes and had their bad sides. Like I do and like I have.
As an adult I gave my inner child what it needed. So it left me with a peace.
I’m fascinated with them. I don’t know how does it feel to live in pretty town. In little scandinavian cottages, in cool italian old buildings with a garden on the roof, in charming parisian tenement house where you walk through fancy gates. What it is like to drink espresso every mornig before your work, walking down the spanish streets, everyday in the same caffeteria, where you know the owner.
How do people function in high apartaments of Geneve, inherited after their grandmothers.
Easily I can tell that for me it’s like living on Mars.
I wonder what will happen with all those monstrous settlements that are big parts of each town and city of Poland. How they will look in 50 years, when now nobody wants to buy a flat that is in a building like that.
This was my childhood, form of coexisting with other people. Hearing their voices every day, smelling what they have for dinner, knowing who’s crying, who has little baby, who’s having a birthday party. Watching the same tv programs they watch. Being a part of a collective sorrow that never leaves this kind of places.
This is a very recent project, that I think will grow up.
I’m considering making it into a comic book.
These are my memories form childhood. We were really wild children. In the era without computers and many tv channels, we had to create our own worlds. Now it seems like a dream.
Gangs of kids, playing, fighting, with broken legs and arms, always dirty, always looking for adventure.
These illustrations are very subjective memories of 80’s and 90’s.
It’s summer though I didn’t have many occasions to experience this time of year, because I’m stuck in work.
Even when I had some free time, I’d spend it rather on drawing or painting than getting sunburned on the beach. But no worries, there is some plan for vacations.
I usually go to the seaside where I have family, so I don’t have to think about hotels overbooked in summer.
Right now, living in a big city I spend my weekends on dreaming about empty beaches (that’s why in my opinion the best time to go there is september).
I love northern seas, Baltic sea makes me connect with nostalgy, with my childhood, hot afternoons with insects buzzing like best kind of music, and cold evenings spent on the sand, when you have to use your towel or blanket to cover yourself.
French fries, ice creams, cold fanta, sound of seagulls, wind messing your hair, chilly water, seaweeds between toes, seashells in pockets, searching for amber, sand in your sandwich, insanely sweet soda, skin detaching of your nose. My summer means seaside. I always miss it, always longing. If I couldn’t go to the seaside, it would mean there was no summer.
There are some impressions, have fun 🙂