Old photos

So I was checking old photo albums, looking for pictures I could use for my mom’s birthday present.

I ended with some more ideas for drawings and thoughts about parenthood, childhood, memories.

I’ve always imagined that a person is adult, when they stop thinking what mother would say about them. For some time now my attitude towards my parents has changed a lot.
I used to have many claims about their behaviour, for a long time I was hurt, remembering what they did wrong. After years of thoughts and work, forgiveness day has come. They didn’t ask for it, it just happened. Not in words, just in my mind, but I felt really relieved.

I’ve learned to see them not as my guardians, but as people that in my age had 3 children. When I stopped awaitening parenting care from them, I finally felt like an adult person.
When you separate all this expectations of a child, it leaves just two people, who did mistakes and had their bad sides. Like I do and like I have.
As an adult I gave my inner child what it needed. So it left me with a peace.

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Water

It happens a lot that I draw or paint water. It always seemed to calm me down. Whenever I’m in stresful situation, somehow I imagine myself surrounded by water. 

Sometimes drowning, sometimes walking into ocean, or just letting my body (in my mind) to go with the flow of the river.

I find peace and relief when I hear the sound of the sea.

When I was a child, doctor told my parents that I should swim a lot for my backbone. So every week my grandfather took me to the swimming pool. Soon he was kind of celebrity there, cause of his open nature and sense of humour. He sligthtly flirted with lady who sold tickets, made buddies with lifeguards and instructors.

I remember that the swimming pool had big windows. I remember that my grandfather took walks around the building when I was swimming and always cheered me from the other side of the wall. 

I had also lots of great memories with the sea from my adult life.

My first vacations with A. and feeling crazy in love.

Lazyness of greek beach and snorkling in warm water.

New Years Eve and hot wine on a cold sand of Baltic sea shore.

Crystal waters surrounding Thailand on our honeymoon.

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Childhood

This is a very recent project, that I think will grow up.

I’m considering making it into a comic book.

These are my memories form childhood. We were really wild children. In the era without computers and many tv channels, we had to create our own worlds. Now it seems like a dream.

Gangs of kids, playing, fighting, with broken legs and arms, always dirty, always looking for adventure. 

These illustrations are very subjective memories of 80’s and 90’s.

 

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